I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize