Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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