so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize