We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
