yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
send nudes
from the living room?
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