So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
