my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
