i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Randomize
