We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
