Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
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