just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Why can't burritos get me drunk
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize