At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Randomize
