so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
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My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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