been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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