he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
