Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
