Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
She just used a chaser for red wine.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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