i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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