It's like God shit irony all over that family
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
These 17 Parents Decided to Cut Contact With Their Horrible Kids
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.