Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize
