Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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