Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
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