She said her name was "party"
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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