D3 body, D1 cock
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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