Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize