So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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