I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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