I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize
