What did we do last night that was yellow?
I am midnight drunk by noon
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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