nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
