final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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