What a fucking waste of an outfit
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Randomize
