Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
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She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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