It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
