Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Randomize
