The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
this boner is exhausting
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
