i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
