Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
What drink are we having for lunch?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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