Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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