Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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