K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
