ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
So much rum. So many feels.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize