Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
