i already hear my dad disowning me
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize