if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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