Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
