I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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