so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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