It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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