Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
