Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
