she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
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After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
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I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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