sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize