Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.